Saturday, February 26, 2005

If a girl cries in front of u,
it means dat she couldnt take it anymore.
If u take her hand,
she would stay with u 4 de rest of ur life;
If u let her go,
she couldnt go back 2 being herself anymore.

A girl wont cry easily,
except in front of the person who she loved the most,
she becomes weak.
A girl wont cry easily,
only when she love u the most,
she put down her ego.

Guys, if a girl cries becus of u,
please hold her hands firmly,
she's the one who would stay with u 4 the rest of ur life.
Guys, if a girl cries becus of u,
please dont give her up,
maybe becus of ur decision,
u ruin her life.

When she cries right infront of u,
when she cries becus of u,
look into her eyes,
can u see n feel the pain n hurt she's feeling?

Think.
Which other girl have cried with pure sincerity,
infront of u, and becus of u?

She cries not becus she is weak,
she cries not becus she wants sympathy or pity,
she cries, becus crying silently is no longer possible.
The pain, hurt n agony have become too big a burden to be kept inside.

Guys, think about it,
if a girl cries her heart out to u,
and all becus of u,
its time to look back on what u have done,
only u will know the answer to it.
Do consider it,
becus one day,
it may b too late for regrets,
it may b too late to say "i'm sorry".

thanx ppl~ haha, thanx for the care & concern =)

guess i shd b fine lar.. mayb i'm tinking too much, juz let things b natural bahz.. so dear frens, dun worry about me k! yay..

oh, todae went to ulu pandan CC for the performance, its quite nice! there're several skits put up by students from diff schools (even from other countries) and i mux admit i was touched by 1 of the skit.. sajc also performed its xiao3 ping3 .. the one i acted b4 de.. juz tt dis time i din act =) hmm, tink i still prefer the last batch of seniors' performance. but no matter wad, they've done their best~ gr8 job! kinda njoyed the whole thingy..

yay~ wkends are here.. block test 1 is nearing too.. ard the 20++ march.. it lasts for 4 days, really hope it'll b over real soon! i hafen enjoy myself for a long long time le..

another thing. Os results will b released soon, yest siewching called and said shes v v v afraid.. haha.. natural for her to develop dis kind of feeling bahz.. i'm also receiving my 'AO' chi results soon too, guess its either the end of next wk or the beginning of next next wk.. whEe~ hope i pass! den i can drop chinese and get dismissed from sch earlier in future! haha, den huiting mei and stupid jieru cannot YAYA in front of us le~ haha yeah!! =)

PIG-IN @ 8:29 PM

Thursday, February 24, 2005

i dun wish to say dis.. but i duno how exactly i'm feeling now.. i dun wish to let you come into my life and leave.. u're a nice person n i wan to grab hold of you so tt u wun slip away.. but do i really wish to do that? i duno.. i noe u will wan to do tt, cus i noe u love me..
i talk alil' about dis w mei tt time.. n both of us shared similar feelings but neither of us noe how to handle it either.. i hope i wun feel lidiz anymore.. becus i wan to spend my life w you..
jus kinda upset now, sum1 pls englighten me.. tell me wad shd i do?

PIG-IN @ 5:06 PM

i duno y.. i'm really really feeling v v tired these days.. last time i could stay up till like 11+ or 12+am de, but recently i almost buay ta han when its juz 10+pm only.. n i juz haf no energy to go aniwhere else after sch.. reach hm wana do tutorials also v sianx diao, as in, its not i dun wan to do, but my brain cant function lor.. wanted to complete the tut, but abit like, too lethargic to do anything.. FATIGUE!!

oOh yeah.. tml gg to watch a play at somewhere erm, i tink is duno wad ulu pandan de lar.. yeah, so no cca~ smilez**

yawnz.. i wana slp le...

I DUN LIKE YOU ANYMORE! SHOO~

PIG-IN @ 4:45 PM

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

i cut my hair le!! its shorter n thinner nw smilez* =)

lazy to blog these days.. actually theres nothing much to blog about either.. in fact, i tink i wun b blogging much in the next few wks to come le bahz..

oh yeah, tt time me and dearie mei was walking along the track to the gallery for pe, den we shared a similar thought.. well, i'm actually still tinking alot about it.. haiix, quite sad huh =( i hope things turn out well still~ same goes to you, mei..

tk care ppl~

i'll pretend i duno anything..

PIG-IN @ 8:39 PM

Sunday, February 20, 2005

funfair was an enjoyable one!! smilez** too mani orders to make.. getting kinda tired of it, so started to get out of the class stall and look at other stalls instead.. i ate 2bowls of sharksfin! heex, of cus lar, my cca stall of cus mux support a bit right.. den walk here and there, saw so mani pple!! afew pri sch frens and sum sec sch frens!! wOaw!! haha.. den jess treated us to chocolate-dipped fruits.. initially wanted to go play Haunted House de, but too long que liao, n gotta report to cca stall for duty, so din go play liao.. nwae, our cca stall has v gd business! the sharksfin v fast sold out liao n i really enjoying doing my duty, cus u're jus so busy every min!! thriving business!!! smilez* bet we earned lotsa profit.. plus each cca member can get a free bowl of sharksfin! heex, so total up i ate 3bowls!! *yumyum* den went to see the 2tallest guy on earth in the hall.. wOo! oh ya, after tt sunyanzi came to our school! den i find myself abit stupid lar, chase after her here and there... haha, spastic but i still did it =P xiaoling was as spastic as me! n i saw stef! in a v close-up manner cus i'm jus so close to her! haha, v sweet and pretty =) den mani ppl surrounding her of cus.. n blahz, yeah.. heard my frens she sang our sch song -_-" but i duno y i din hear it haha.. nwae fun fair was extended for another 30mins (due to popular demand) so it ended at 5pm.. did clearance stuff after tt, n mani of us became v grouchy cus of dis cleaning up cus.. blahz. but still had lotsa fun fooling ard =) i piggybacked yijun and jess was smacking her butt =P wahaha!
6 of us dined at harborfront sc after tt.. luffed and had fun again! left at ard 8.45pm.. reached home n immediately collapsed on the sofa, damn tiring. den suddenly mummy said i got phonecall saying hes from harborfront foodcourt management and they found my wallet! den i blur blur n din even realise i lost my wallet lar!! careless me, but i'm lucky smilez* mon after sch will go down collect it~ yeah! tts end of yesterday!
todae gotta stay home do hmwrk liao! =)

PIG-IN @ 11:49 AM

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

yeah!! i'm finally finally in the mood to blog le! past few days feeling quite sad cus mummy ignored me, she dun wan tok to me.. all my fault lar, i v bad girl, make her angry and talk back at her =( *remorseful* tink i make her v sad and hurt also.. sorry mummy!! i still LOVE you lots!!! haha.. though mummy cant see dis, but heex.. nvm, i noe i love her can le =D finally patched things up w her juz nw le.. hoho~ i'm really really really SO SO SO HAPPI!!! oh yeah, n she allows me go out w darling on fri nite also liao.. gonna reach home late tt day cus will b gg for social nite w darling at hardrock cafe.. if i dun go, darling will b w/o a date n he'll gotta b confined for 7weeks! hmm.. so guess i'll b skipping cca and the stalls set-up preparation le bahz..

yepx~ dis sat will b sajc funfair le! ppl pls come hor!

woo!! i'm jus so happi!!! haha~~

oh yeah! i hafen congratulate huiting mei and yk for being together AGAIN~ hahaz.. guess u 2 will cherish dis relationship much much much more than the previous time right! wish u 2 ever-lasting alwis~ n stay so xingfu too =)

PIG-IN @ 6:45 PM

Sunday, February 13, 2005

met up w darling dis morning.. was feeling alright n quite happi, jus tt my voice kinda sore~ den supposedly, i agreed to meet wen at lot1 cus she wana get smth, n i also wana get smth also.. haha, den duno lar, on the way i felt dizzy and unwell again.. sianx diao. darling acc me there, n bought mineral water + strepsils at ntuc. met up w wen after tt. she asked darling to send me home cus she say my voice sore until lidat, better for me to go home.. well, ok lor.. listened to wen's advice n headed home w darling.. wen went off to get her stuff alone, feel kinda bad.. but i guess its right for me to go home.. on the way back, my head kept spinning and spinning, made me feel like vomitting.. i'm glad darling is there =) took 334 but we overshot the busstop where we shd alight.. cus nobody pressed the bell.. hai hao its only 1 stop further, if not will hafta walk quite long.. yeah, den i asked darling to go up my hse n help me fill in the survey form.. stupid wen asked me to help her fill up de.. hoHo! den he left n i went to tk temp... 38.3deg C! sianx diao.. fever is back again.. so i took my medicine and sleep le.. ZzzZzzz! woke up n took temp again, 37.9 degC =) ate strepsils too.. n i feel better now~ hope tml i'll recover!!!

PIG-IN @ 5:02 PM

Saturday, February 12, 2005

yest had a bad fever.. morning started quite ok.. but my body temp startin rising every time i measured w my thermometer.. from 36.6 to 37.4, den to 38.4.. jess n yj are sick too, but they 2 went home earlier.. well, i din wan to skip maths tut, so i stayed in sch till the end.. elf saw me home after sch. finally reached home n rested, w a wet cloth over my forehead, tot the bad fever will subside after i woke up.. but horrifyingly, it shot right up to 39.3! scared the wits hell out of me!! started crying and crying cus i was imaging all the consequences of high fever.. brain damage, fits and blahz.. omg~ mum took me to doc at ard 8pm.. whEe~ doc was naggy n weird.. asked her qns and dun answer.. bleahx.. stupid doc lar, but shes quite experienced (acc to my mum).. went back home and did wad the doc advised, n went to sleep at 9pm.. woke up afew times in the middle of the nite for medication.. n i'm perfectly well again~ smilez** the medicine really v effective huh.. temp fell to normal body range after tt.. whEe!! glad my brain aint damaged =D
thanx darling for the lozenges!
n thanx to all my frens who cared!
love ya ppl~
oh ya, hope jess and yj are fine too..

PIG-IN @ 3:57 PM

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

i met up w sooeng, wen n weejie on chinese new year eve! wahahaha~~ really miss hanging out w them!! n i realise i can b v natural whenever i'm w them.. ya, its like, i can jus display my true self b4 them.. haiiz.. really miss them lots!! had so much fun w them lar, n i really LOL quite afew times tt day.. its been so long since i last luffed so hard.. well.. really hope can see them soon again!

whEe~ todae 1st day of chinese new year!! but my ang bao money quite little lehz.. v sad larz.. hahax, nvm, tml go 'hunt' for more money! wheeEeeeE!!!!
oh ya!! todae i saw vicki in her black-white tube dress at JE interchange.. heex, i find her quite pretty lar, but my sis said so-so only.. hmm, my sis arh, really got so high expectations lar..
yeah!! den jus nw as i gg home w my family, den we are on the mrt towards JE right.. WAHAHA, den i saw kangwei!!! oh manz.. so coincidental! actually sumhow i haf a feelin i may meet him todae leh.. as in i haf dis feeling since morning, hahaha! den really saw him lar! he also saw me lar.. he boarded same train as me, n sumore same carriage as me!! hoHo~ hes w his bro and mum, i wonder where is his father.. haha, nwae.. kw and his bro are in red, so traditional =P

i go watch tv now le.. haha, nice comedy.. happy new year everyone YAY!!

PIG-IN @ 9:10 PM

Monday, February 07, 2005

i'm hhiiigghh and excited todae! haha, i tink jieru and yijun were equally high as me lar haha! YEAH, CHINESE NEW YEAR WILL BE HERE REAL SOON! hoHoHo~ yeah.. tts wad i wana blog.. haha, lazy to type other things liao.. also nth much.. yeah, main point is.. LETS ALL ENJOY DIS FESTIVE SEASON! WHeE! *GOR GOR GEH!*

PIG-IN @ 9:16 PM

Friday, February 04, 2005

well, started the day off quite moodily lar.. but still alright.. heEx~ started to cheer up more as the day goes by..

oh yeah, thanx darling, ur sms is so disgusting but its dis sms which lighted up my face w a wide smile =) the 1st smile of todae..

hOhO~ school was as usual, the phy test was rather tough, bet to fail it.. well, its over, lets juz hope i wun fail so badly bah! hEex, chinese lesson was ok lar n i kind of enjoyed it! i really like my chi tcher so so so much!! shes so fine-tempered and patient and tolerant w our nasty class.. i mean, ya its true our class can b quite nasty at times, esp when our class is making so much noise and yet shes tryin so hard not to lose her temper and speaks louder (but still gentle) to us.. really luv her alot!! todae she asked us to listen to a new year song, not those da4 di1 hui2 chun1 tt kind.. the title is 'zhen1 xi1 lai2 lin2 de4 yi1 nian2'.. she also gaf us the lyrics and after dis, we haf to pass the paper around for everyone to write anything (crappy stuff or new year wishes) for one another.. yup, our tcher also wrote for us, n yeah, we wrote back for her too!! i mean, shes jus so nice lar.. cus i sit at the front row in class during chi lesson, den i saw her writing our papers, its like.. she carried a smile on her face whilst writing each and every single pc of paper.. kind of makes me feel tt shes sumone who'll b happy/glad when seeing others happy or smth.. or mayb tt kind of person who is easily contented w sum minor lil' things.. yeah, as simple as tt.. a nice tcher!! smilez** hope our class will learn to appreciate and listen to her in class more!!

yup, went harborfront to shop w boifren yj, huiting mei and jess xi ka ceng (haha!!). haha, we spent nearly 2hrs inside 1 single shop lar!! but its so fun trying out diff clothes and giving each other opinions you mei you?! yuyu dear and yk (plus elsie) joined us soon after tt.. but jess had to leave quite early cus shes also meeting her mum at chinatown (or orchard, cant rem) to shop also heEx~ nwae i finally bought a brown top from tt shop! its kind of different cus i've nv bought a tube-alike blouse b4.. yah, so yeah! hEex~ and they all say i look quite nice in it.. haha, n thanx arh yk, for praising me tt i look gd! hoho!! so happi lar! oh yeah, boifren yj also bought the same top! =)
den jus nw mummy said its not bad also~ later gonna show my sis!! heEx! but i predict she'll say the blouse is nice! WAHAHA!
i went home w yj, whilst the rest went ps to shop further lar.. but its quite late (about 5pm liao), so i din join them~ hEex!!

-home sweet home-
-tutorials time!-
-byebye!-

PIG-IN @ 7:26 PM

Thursday, February 03, 2005

i feel i'm losing my true self eversince i entered dis hideous awful ugly fake class..
i juz hate my jc life.. well, except for my 1st 3mths class.. those are the ONLY beautiful memories i haf.. juz nw whilst on my way home, i smsed the ex-s11 frens and told them i really miss them.. started to imagine and reminisce the old fun times we've had tgt.. really triggered my tear glands alot! i duno, but i jus wish to get out of dis class soon.. i dun wan to go to sch everyday, facing so mani masked faces.. like jess said, its so tiring to play guessing games and blahz.. well, i juz dun like it.. totally hate it.

Blogging is the best way to manifest my true feelings about anything, anyone..

i suddenly feel a heavy burden on my shoulders.. theres still so mani miles ahead of me, but i noe i still haf frens who'll b by my side, continuing dis journey down w me.. thanx dear frenz!! really glad to haf u ppl in sch, if not i realli cant imagine how i'm gg to survive in dis totally disgusting class n u can nv noe wad ur other frens may b tinking/feeling.. its juz so saddening to noe how ur fren appears to b smiling cheerfully at ur another fren, yet he/she is actually backstabbing and cursing so much behind tt another fren's back.. oh my.. dis is so idiotic!

dear ex-s11 frenz, u ppl really made my day.. even w those simple sms replies.. miss ya guys! tk gd care!

PIG-IN @ 6:41 PM

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

You Are 20 Years Old

20 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

PIG-IN @ 6:27 PM

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

well, i luv dis bulletin posted on frenster.. decided to paste it in my blog too.. dear frens, do read it..

Timing is everything, even in love.
And when you are not ready to commit, you could end up regretting it.
SOMETIMES, timing rather than love decides who we end up being with - or without.
Only some lucky people marry the loves of their lives.
The rest marry the most suitable person who comes along when they are ready to settle down.

A friend in his 20s came to this conclusion after confiding in me that he had recently met a woman who is more attractive than his wife, and so occupies his thoughts more often than his wife does. 'If only I had met her before I got married,' he said wistfully.

But I think even if the love of one's life appears when one is single, one may not be in the right frame of mind to recognise him or her as such.
And then love passes by.
Life is littered with near misses and lost opportunities.

I attended my ex-boyfriend's wedding last month, which triggered many memories. We met five years ago when I was 23 and he 31. It was love at first sight. He had an established career, was down-to-earth and steadfastly religious. I was then working as an air stewardess and my head was - literally and metaphorically - in the clouds. I was also - well, let's put it this way - not religious. Despite our differences, we were soulmates. We had the same quirky sense of humour and shared long, intense overnight conversations. But human nature is perverse. When someone is excessively nice to us, we start taking things for granted, instead of appreciating them even more. My ex sent me to the airport, fixed my PC, reminded me to take health supplements - and go to church. He had everything I could want in a husband -except that I was not looking for one. A boyfriend was all I could cope with then. I loved fast cars, danced wildly at Zouk and took off on shopping holidays at a whim. My life revolved around I, me and myself. In the six months that we were together, he popped the question several times and talked ad nauseam about having children. He wanted us to enrol for a Christian marriage preparation course. Yes, I did often fantasise about a Vera Wang wedding gown, but I was at that stage of my life when I was more interested in Guess than Baby Guess. And where - dare I admit it? - I still wanted to meet other men. So I was a 23-year-old with the emotional maturity of a 13-year-old. Responsibility? Wasn't that for adults?
In short, I met Mr Right at the wrong time. The more he talked about marriage and religion, the more I felt pressured and the more pressured I felt, the more irritable I became. I was too impatient to compromise. Every trivial matter blew up as a big deal. My mood obliterated the good in our relationship and reached a point where I just wanted out. He was heartbroken; I was sad but relieved. He still called me regularly, beseeching me to change my mind. The calls stopped finally after a year. Now and then, we say 'Hi' via e-mail. I had a few painful relationships after that. Served me right, as those rude wake-up calls were necessary for me to realise the meaninglessness of my hedonistic high life. I missed the tenderness of my ex and began having second thoughts. Perhaps I also felt more urgency to find someone marriageable before my biological clock reached zero hour. It dawned on me that I am not a pixie like Peter Pan who can flit around forever. One day, I'd wake up sick and alone when my fair weather friends flit away. But I was too proud and too unsure of my ex's reaction to call him until last year.The first thing he told me excitedly was that he had found The One. My heart tumbled to my feet. So, that's Fate. If only I could turn back time. If only I had met him later.

If only... what feeble words.
These days, I am more circumspect.
I have come to terms with my loss.

PIG-IN @ 7:35 PM